Postpartum Depression & BPD

It is common for other mental illnesses to occur alongside borderline personality disorder. But sometimes you fail to recognise the signs of the other illness, as many symptoms can overlap with the symptoms of BPD. So you may assume it’s the BPD spiralling out of control.

This happened to me when I had postpartum depression.

Within a day of giving birth to my daughter, I had the baby blues. Although I was happy, I felt anxious and over emotional. I would start crying for no reason and didn’t have much of an appetite. But after a week had passed, other than being exhausted from my baby girl waking me up multiple times at night, I felt fine.

I felt fine for the next 6 months. I loved playing and cuddling with my daughter. I liked watching her reach her monthly milestones. And I enjoyed taking her out to go see my friends, shop and walk around the town.

7 months after giving birth I started to feel uneasy again. But this time I felt severely anxious and stressed. I had no interest in going out and wasn’t bonding so much with my daughter anymore. I would get frustrated and rage over little things, then break down in despair for hours. Everything became too overwhelming.

At first I thought I was losing control of my BPD symptoms. But then I started feeling like I was about to snap and have a psychotic break. This feeling would not go away. It scared me and I didn’t know what to do, so I called my mother.

After explaining to her how I was feeling, she told me it sounded like I had postpartum depression. I had been under the impression that postpartum depression developed within a couple of months after childbirth. It never occurred to me that it could actually appear a lot later. A couple of days later, I saw a doctor and they confirmed that I did in fact have postpartum depression.

From then on, my S.O. started helping me more with our daughter, and I started taking herbal medication (as I was still breastfeeding). Within a couple of months I recovered from postpartum depression, and was back to my stage of recovery with BPD. I was also back to loving my daughter wholeheartedly, and enjoying every second of every day with her.

If you suspect you have postpartum depression or any other mental illness, don’t hesitate to make an appointment with your doctor. If you don’t seek treatment, it will only get worse.

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